You know how you can get really excited about something, and there's always that one person that you want to talk to about it, but for whatever reason you need to hold off on talking to them? And then, by the time you actually get the chance to talk to them about it, you've built it up in your mind, and maybe fantasized about what their reactions will be and how they'll feel about it? And once you actually start off the conversation, like, "so...have you heard about [the thing I'm really excited about]?" only to have them cut you off with something along the lines of "Yes! I HATE that! It's so stupid!" If you do know what I'm talking about, then you should know not to be such a Negative-Norbert.
There's nothing that kills a conversation quite like expressing your open disdain for whatever it is that your date was talking about. It's totally fine to have a difference of opinion -- if it wasn't, the world would be far more uninteresting. It's just how you handle the expression of your negative opinions that matters. If you don't want to make things awkward and unpleasant, at least immediately, you'll say something only mildly dismissive, like, "yeah, I've heard of it, but it never really grabbed me," and then you'll politely listen to your date talk about it. You can converse this way for a while, adding in your opinions to what they say about the subject, and the conversation will come to an end as soon as they've shared with you whatever it is that they originally wanted to share. Sure, you wasted a few minutes listening to something that you're never going to find yourself interested in, but at least you helped to make them happy for those few minutes, and now you can move the conversation in a new direction.
The problem with this is that we often have the impulse to speak our mind when we have very strong feelings about something, which is why many of us immediately express our disdain for the things that we really don't like. The trick to figuring out when not to do this would be...whenever someone brings it up out of the blue. In my experience I've found that, when someone brings up a subject of conversation, it's not just because they want to hear your views on it, it's because they want you to listen to theirs. Naturally, when you're speaking with friends or colleagues, there will be the occasional individual that wants to debate something for the sake of argument, but on a date it's far less likely to happen, if only because we generally want to keep our dates light and positive. The more negative discussions can be saved for later on in the relationship.
Another factor one has to consider when poo-pooing the thoughts and opinions of your (potential) lover, is how sensitive they are as a person. If you're on a date with someone who has a lot of emotions, then you are likely going to hurt their feelings, make them feel less than intelligent, and you also have the potential to make them cry.
When you have the urge to say anything negative, just ask yourself this: "do I want to be remembered as a Debbie-Downer?" If the answer is yes, then you're probably not getting a second date. You can be as negative and unpleasant as you want when the relationship is ending, because, I mean, what have you got to lose at that point? But during the beginning you should be on your best behaviour.
I'm not saying that you shouldn't be yourself, because I'm a firm believer that you should let any potentials know what they're getting into straight off the bat. I'm just saying that you should be...your ideal self. If what your date is looking for is the ideal you, then keeping up that façade for the first little while will help you become the perfect you. That was terrible advice, just disregard this paragraph entirely.
Just be a good, fun person, that's all I ask.
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